Coaxing a baby to use a spoon for the first time, teaching a kindergartener to tie a shoe or practicing parallel parking with a teen - these routine parenting tasks aren’t merely milestones for the scrapbook. They’re part of guiding a child toward independence, a process that often involves more than a few pitfalls along the way. Experts say preparing children to become happy, successful adults starts long before kids leave the nest. In fact, children start learning self-confidence and self-reliance in infancy. Here’s how to foster your child’s budding independence, starting today.
Becky’s parents divorced when she was 15 years old. Her family’s troubles and her coping mechanisms began much earlier. Kids cope with family trouble in different ways. Some kids withdraw; others act out. Becky coped through achievement.
When I was a teenager, I spent a day over the holidays volunteering in a soup kitchen with my mother. It was both an eye-opening and a wonderful experience. I really felt like I was doing something good for the world. But after the experience was over, I soon forgot about the entire thing and went back to my self-absorbed teenage self. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I discovered again the joy that comes with selfless giving.
When I was picking up my daughter from a Brownie meeting one afternoon, the leader took me aside. Obviously concerned, she informed me that my daughter was not participating in the troop’s rowdy post-meeting play periods. Instead, she stood on the sidelines and watched. I shrugged. “Yes, she’s a watcher,” I said. “It’s no big deal.” My comment was met with a frown. I murmured an excuse and went to find my offspring, anxious to make my exit before I blurted out the “i” word: Introvert.
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