When Holly Stewart visited Victoria, BC with her parents, husband, and young son Henry, she’d planned museum trips, sightseeing, and restaurant meals. Not on the agenda? Embarrassing public meltdowns. But during a visit to the Royal British Columbia Museum, that’s just what happened. At a hands-on gold panning demonstration on the museum’s third floor, four-year-old Henry found and promptly lost a small piece of gold, and then lost his cool.
I am glad my step-dad never tried to be a father to me, so we didn’t have to get into any power struggles. He became an adult friend and mentor. He was generous with his time. He listened a lot, and gave love freely,” shares Dave from the group. In this group, divorced or separating parents learn communication and parenting strategies.
Clothes having to match. Toys arranged in neat rows. Outbursts over not being able to get a task right the first time. These behaviors can indicate to parents that they may have a perfectionist on their hands, for better or for worse. Perfectionists have high standards. Perfectionists can be driven to achieve. But they can also get tied up in knots over their expectations of themselves. And as psychologist Madeline Levine suggests in her book, Teach Your Children Well, performance-oriented children “are so afraid of failing that they challenge themselves far less, take fewer risks, and therefore limit opportunities for growth.”
If you’ve ever left the house with a child wearing a superhero cape or a princess dress, or if you’ve ever noticed your child’s socks don’t match as you’re dropping them off at school or realized their shirt was on backward when you are picking them up from school at the end of the day, you know the challenges of dressing kids. Whether it’s a matter of clothes not matching or convincing your child to bundle up in cold weather, handling wardrobe issues can be sticky.
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