While shopping recently, a teen celebrity magazine caught my daughter’s eye. I was prepared for the begging to kick in, which would quickly be followed by the pouting when I refused to purchase the magazine for her. But I was pleasantly surprised when she didn’t even ask me to pay for the magazine. She quietly put it back on the shelf and followed me when I told her it was time to move on with our shopping.
When I see my kid flipping out over not getting a toy at the grocery store checkout aisle, scary things pop into my head. I picture my kid, in the future, throwing a pen across the room at their boss when they don’t get the promotion they want. I also picture them trying unsuccessfully to deal with things I have to deal with every day: road rage, a tantrum-y toddler, impatience over a failing recipe. And this is why I am determined to raise a resilient, problem-solving child, one who is able to roll with the punches life will inevitably throw their way.
Sometimes a parent’s ‘the-arts-just-aren’t-necessary’ attitude can tragically squelch a young person’s creative aspirations, and a parent who is too gung-ho about a child’s talents may not realize that hijacking dreams robs a child of healthy feelings of ownership and independence. Fortunately, many parents find the balanced middle. They figure out how to quietly stand behind a young person’s aspirations without taking over, and they find ways to supportively usher their child toward creating a colorful future for themselves.
Ouch! Whether disrespectful behavior plays out in the sandbox, the family room, or the boardroom, it hurts. Adults and children alike feel the sting of disrespect. Per a new University of Kentucky study, children as young as 6 recognize and respond to disrespect, often with anger. Parents and caregivers use the term ‘disrespect’ to cover a broad range of behaviors, from failing to offer polite greetings to eye rolls, sighs, and mouthing off. Regardless of the form it takes, we don’t like it. Thankfully, even if disrespect is a regular visitor in your home, it’s possible to build more respectful family relationships based on empathy and mutual respect, says Tiffany Sands, a licensed counsellor. Read on for age-by-age guidance on ditching disrespect for good.
Calgary’s Child Magazine © 2019 Calgary’s Child